Aphera Music

I mean it – summer crushes you – your heart, your healthy habits, your belief in a thing called love.

“No one needs me,” said an exchange student staying with us this summer, as she stared at her foreign equivalent of facebook.

“What do you mean? You have five unread messages!”

That’s how I replied to her absurd comment. Her response: “Well, when that one specific person you want doesn’t message you, it’s like no one is messaging you.”

Fair enough… Well, this seems to be the summer sentiment and I’ve noticed that pining over someone makes us in to genuine messes. We return from programs abroad and obsess over the foreign loves we left behind. Our college friends go away (sometimes overseas) and we think it’s over forever. Old flames – well sometimes they just burn out. Or literally, they’re sitting next to you smoking pot and you’re like, “What the hell happened to you?”

What’s the cure? Well I’ve heard several, but they involve running away, staring at emails and convincing yourself you don’t want to answer and pretending everything is okay.  Don’t do this. Instead, admit that you are, as R.E.M. sings, “A sad tomato… three miles of bad road.”

In their song, “Crush With Eyeliner”, Michael Stipe sings that he’s “smitten” with someone who is an absolute mess. “I know you’ve seen her…she’s three miles of bad road …I am smitten, I’m the real thing.” God, just make these lyrics your anthem. What’s more empowering than being three miles of bad road and having someone imbibed, infatuated and smitten with you? My solution? … Embrace your hott mess status and move the hell on.

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